Letter 14. How to make good life decisions.


 For Happiness …

Dear Thinette

Have you realize how short life really is! Think  of of this way, you sleep about 1/3 of your life and the other 1/3 goes to living  entertainment, eating, time spend with family and friends, working and commuting, the everyday normal things we do. If life’s expectancy is 75 years then 50 years are gone.

The last 25 years can be divided in the first 18 years learning how to walk, speak, read and write, growing up, being totally dependent on your parents. This leaves you with 7 years to pursue your dreams, which you might spend working to fulfill other people’s dreams and goals. How many of those 7 years have you already wasted my dear?

Dan Lok says ” Life is too short to wake up with regrets! Develop a sense of Urgency to chase your own success and goals, Step up to life and live on your own Terms”  How to make good life decisions to fulfill your own dreams and goals is very important.

Being happy and content are an accepted norm in life. Everybody seeks happiness. Making good choices in life with discussions, deliberation and being conclusive. Follow important steps to have a good life, whether it is at work or at home. 

Choosing a career is the second most importance choice you will make. Know what you want in life and that will help you decide. Find what really interest you and what you are passionate about in life and build a career around it.

Image of " BE SMART"

When you feel you are not getting anywhere in the current situation because of a bad choice, it is not the end of the world my dear. Be never rigid or land in a rut. Make an informed decision and move on to greener pastures, don’t waste time. Step up, change your mediocre mindset and habits, get out of your comfort zone.

Approach everything with an open mind and question anything and have an urgency in all you do. Making good life decisions is imperative for well-being and happiness. It is important to keep this in mind when making good life decisions.

Statue of a Thinker.

A Free Thinker

  • Do you think outside the box? Are you a free thinker? A Free Thinker is a person who rejects accepted opinions made by society just because. An opinion should be based on reason and logic, rather than traditional authoritarian dogma. Find opinions based on your ability of independent thought and belief in the truth.

  • Know who you are and stay true to yourself, be selfish and put yourself first, regret nothing and live in the now and in the future. Yesterday is gone under the bridge and nothing can change it. Forget about it, only take the lesson learnt from it. You have a choice to change it in future.

  • Make core values count. Having respect for everything and everyone is of vital importance. Be always honest, be a positive team player, trustworthy and live a life of stress-free openness.

  • Know what you want, be realistic and happy about it, set the bar high enough to reach and move upward.

  • Put yourself first. Take care of yourself. Develop and become the best. Read and gain as much Knowledge as you can and gain your experiences from it, become the best in your field.

  • Make your own decisions long term and short term, figure out what do you need and want in live, freedom of speech to express yourself, travel, a family, financial freedom, become rich? Make a list of priorities if it will help you, and make a decision. Plan your goals strategically and follow up on them

How will you handle Obstacles. An obstacle is an obstruction and hindrance hampering success. Identify obstacles and unarmed them.

Picture of a tree log blocking a road.

How to Overcome your Obstacles

  • Reclaim your power. Stop feeling the victim, you can conquer this. Get up, stand tall with confidence and look the obstacle in the eye.

  • Distance yourself from the problem, get up and walk out, get a cup of coffee and try to see reality. See it in context and have a balanced perspective.

  • Break it in smaller goals. If the problem seems overwhelming, start with the smallest step to go slowly forward and plan your strategy based on your success.

  • Have patience stay committed and focused to solve the problem, nothing happens with the snap of a finger my love.  Have the mindset to see this through and as a challenge to grow.

  • Never sidestep an obstacle, take a moment and find a way to outdistance this problem because you can. Mentally you will grow and gain maturity in experience.

  • Car with a flat tyre.

There are different forms of obstacles. Not only can it be the physical hindrance in the form of a difficult co-worker, a parking ticket or a flat tyre. Sometimes you can be your own worst nightmare.

Being Your Own Worst Obstacle

An obstacles can be anyone of these

  • Not having optimism. Nothing is as bad as a negative attitude. It is like a car in reverse gear, you go nowhere soon.

  • Discipline. Do I have to say anymore, only a positive attitude towards achievement and the dedication to make it happen can bring the change.

  • No Foresight. See the bigger picture and the goal at the end. Plan with insight.  People with emotional intelligence are way ahead. Only a conservative rigid mindset have no vision of the future. They live in a very small world.

  • When living a day to day live, there will be no progress. Find what interests you, feel enthusiastic about life and do planning.  It will be contagious and you will achieve your goals much sooner than you think.

  • No Commitment. One can plan and start a fantastic project but with no commitment it is futile. Be enthusiastic about your passion and commitment comes easy.

  • Resilience. It is the ability to recover quickly after a setback. Be flexible and open to possibilities to solve a problem. Be never to set in your ways or lose track with reality.

  • Curiosity killed cats as they say.  Never ask what, where, when or why  about other people. It is best to confine yourself to your own business. The rest of the people and their behaviour out there are a distraction from reaching your dream goal.

  • Written on a blackboard WHY, WHO WHEN, WHERE, WHAT.
  • Never make comparisons or assume. Each person or situation is unique, not two are the same. Never make the mistake to assume, you will always land with the wrong conclusion.

  • Find new solutions. We live in an era where changes occur daily, nothing stays the same. The best strategy is to seek knowledge, adapt and go with the evolution of change.

Most of these are bad habits and will be easy to rectify. I know you will know how to deal with it.

Everybody is prone to obstacles in life, some people choose to be the victim, some choose to be a survivor and then you get the go-getter who choose to conquer overcome an win.

A helping hand reaching out ready to grab

Finding an Adviser and Mentor

Find a mentor who personify your ideal. Ask questions and listen to their advice.  Do what they advise. They have already walked the road and know the pitfalls. Learn from them, remember experience holds the key.

How to Choose Your Friends Wisely

Choose your friends with care. They are the extension of your life. Friends are more important than you think, choosing them wisely is one of the cornerstones of your social life.

Two couples walking in the park relaxing and enjoying the moment.

Friendship is based on mutual trust and respect. You must be able to depend on one another for support, advice and honesty in a time of importance.

Good true best friends makes you feel secure and boost your confidence. There should be nothing in their behaviour making you question their honesty and sincerity .

Choose friends with a similar background as you, it makes understanding each other a lot easier.

Stay away from friends talking down to you and making you feel unworthy.
This falls under toxic relationships, and they are not your friends. Never try to be everybody’s friend. Find one or two trustworthy couples with the same positive values and enjoy good times together. Find your rules and guidelines to have a good life.

How to make good life decisions is so important. You have to develop a vibe, listen to advice but make your own choices and decisions. Your inner voice coming from your subconscious mind will help guiding you.

Love you

Gran Stella


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