The Secret Language of Relationships


Inspire Motivate And Empower The Next Generation


Dear Thinette

Thinette my granddaughter

The secret language of any successful relationships is to be a strong, motivated individual, and most of all, emotionally and financially stable and independent. Be happy and content within yourself, and the best is to earn your own money. If not, relationships will fail or be a disaster.

Ask yourself: Am I ready to meet my perfect match and have a successful happy relationship? Have I reached the goals I have set?

As an example: when going on a date you always make sure to look your best physically, therefore clean and shiny hair, nails well-groomed and shoes. Stylish clothes for the occasion, butterflies in your tummy making the moment perfect.

That is the glossy outside he can see, but what about the clutter of emotional baggage you are dragging around?

Are you still an unorganized mess, tangled thoughts, a knot of stress and a turmoil of emotions? What if you can feel inside just as well-groomed as outside, for instance, calm, happy and all your emotions under control. 

We are going to try our best to create a groomed personality to match the smile on your face. Let us start working, my love

The secret language of relationships and the managing thereof. and how to be ready to meet your special One. I am sure you will find your perfect match with these tips for a good relationship, above all, you will know the secret language of relationships.

The Secret of Relationships with Guidance with Granny


   The Secret Language of Relationships. Unhappy woman shouting

Have you seen women crumbling under pressure, losing themselves and becoming hysterical? It is never good to see when a pretty woman loses control, panics and shouts, as a matter of fact, it is very humiliating.


To become an emotionally strong woman you need to change your mindset and never feel the victim. Have a balanced outlook and distance yourself from the problem, most importantly, looking at it from the other side of the fence, and stay calm.

How to handle a traumatic negative experience as a strong woman.

   The Secret Language of Relationships. Crying and heartbroken

To overcome Trauma

  • Give yourself permission to feel sad and angry, express yourself and live it out. Throw a dozen eggs against a wall if you feel it will help, my dear. [Remember to clean up afterwards]

  •  Pull the covers over your head.

  • Cry your eyes out and feel sorry for yourself.

  • Try to figure out what happened and accept it.

  • In the end, nothing happens without a reason. Later you will realise it was for the best, though now it looks like the end of the world.

  • Don’t take forever to recover.

  • Analyse and acknowledge the facts my darling, begin the recovering process as soon as possible.

  • Get over it,  firstly life is too short to waste time.

A relationship that makes you feel sad and upset most of the time, is not worth it.

 Change to your survival attitude.

Realize something much better will come out of this and this wonderful thing might be waiting right around the corner.

Get yourself up and going, simultaneously, get ready for the next exciting experience.

Dig deep and find your silver lining, making positive declarations, it will bring a change in attitude.

Language of Relationships


•  Never act out of desperation. Never act crazy or do silly things. Keep yourself together and try to act calm and normal, though you don’t feel like it.

• Listen to your intuition it will never fail you, as a matter of fact, you will have your solution right there.

• Do not get jealous, it does not become you and is never an answer to a lost or fading relationship. Move on.

The Secret Language of Relationships . A green jealousy devil image

• Hold on … have faith in yourself … EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY!

• Remember all have a purpose and in addition, you will benefit from it.

Surrender to what has happened. You can not change it.


Become a Mystery Woman

Guidance with Granny The Secret Language of Relationships

  The Secret Language of Relationships. Thinette looking mysterious with cat

To become a mysterious, magnetic, beautiful extraordinary woman is the secret to catching the eye of a special man. It is time to clean out old useless habits making you one of the flock. Here are a few new habits making it possible.

• Confidence is very important, most of all it comes with knowledge.  Make it your mission to know as much as you can, without arrogance.

   The Secret Language of Relationships. Girl walking tall with confidence 

Walk tall with long strides, hold your head high with an air of confidence. Being poised and calm oozes confidence.

Feel the Goddess you are!

• Become a good listener. Look the person in the eye and focus on what he says, importantly, give comments to make sure you understand what the meaning of the conversation is.

A couple talking and being good listeners

Really be interested in him or her and give them your full attention, therefore, never interrupt.

Remember my dear, people will always remember how you make them feel. They will remember your reaction when seeing them, and certainly, how you make them feel when you are around.

• Always be calm and composed no matter what the situation might be. Be energetic and dynamic, never a Goodie-two-shoes. Speak with vigour and vitality, most of all, always maintaining to be alive and in motion.

• Have an interesting life by adding diversity and originality to your personality, your relationships and your physical appearance. Never be boring and predictable.  Always be well-groomed with a happy smile on your face. It will create an aura of fascination around you.

 Every man wants his special woman to be an exciting, feminine, interesting, imaginative, mysterious, expressively touching and magically exotic! Above all, he wants his own Geisha girl.

Guidance with Granny The Secret Language of Relationships

What is a Geisha Girl?

  The Secret Language of Relationships. Photo of Geisha girls

Secrets of a Geisha girl is something many people wonder about. The mystical aura around the Geisha girl has been an intriguing fascinating phenomenon for centuries. She originates from Japan and was known as a woman pleasing men.

• Be an extraordinary woman. An emotionally and financially independent woman, therefore, never relies on any man for her well-being, has her own place to stay, her own money and her dignity.

• Is well-trained in a specific skill and earns her own money from producing a product, is well-mannered, soft-spoken, well-educated and could fit with ease anywhere in society.

• She is ultra-feminine the way she dresses and her behaviour is impeccable, always cool, calm and collective with confidence, but behind closed doors, I believe she can be a tiger. One even married a Prince.

The Secret Language of Relationships.


Commitment is a very important matter to a man. When he does, it means he is absolutely ready and sure to take you on as his responsibility. Making a promise to your dad and in a church or otherwise, is serious.

A man will not commit, if he is not ready or if you are not The One. He has to contemplate, calculate and reason within himself to make sure before he makes that important decision. You have to respect that. Until then, he plays the field and discovers different personalities, searching for The One to be able to make a better choice.

Animation of a Wedding couple

Women should learn from this experience to do the same instead of wanting to marry every Dick Tom and Harry she has an affair with.  Take your time, explore and meet different men to make a better choice too.

On the other hand, she sees commitment as a dream comes true and she can live ‘happily ever after’ with every man she has an affair with.

If a man does not say what she wants to hear, she will start manipulating and being demanding. She doesn’t take the time to know or try to gain the knowledge to understand the way men behave and why.

Time Out

A man and a woman need some alone time, away from each other. He can spend time with friends or practising a sport.  Missing each other, think and appreciate each other will have its value.

Men having a good time out.

Allow him some alone time with his friends once a week and you, on the other hand,  you can visit your parents, a friend and have coffee together somewhere.

Never discuss your partner or his behaviour with anybody especially not your friends. That stays private. 

Come home and share your outing with your partner, make him part of your afternoon experience, but, do not share a secret your friend has trusted you with.

Sharing the experience with your partner will enhance your trust and intimacy in the partnership, consequently, it will strengthen your bond.

Why do men lie?


That is the reason why men lie to a woman. When you get pushy and demanding he will say whatever it takes to keep you quiet, make you happy and say what you want to hear. It won’t be the truth, and then one day he will just disappear.

Impatience and ignorance on the side of a woman cause major confusion,  for instance, it leads to misunderstandings and unhappiness.

Guidance with Granny The Secret Language of Relationships


Men are focused and always on a mission to achieve a goal, therefore, they are not emotional beings.

In his mind, HIS MISSION IS VERY IMPORTANT TO HIM AND ALWAYS COMES FIRST! He would rather achieve his goal than make a commitment to a woman, therefore learn to respect the importance of that.

A laptop with lots of reminders means  man on a mission.


Remember if you tick all his boxes of importance, he will most definitely see you as The One, and you become his mission. He will change some direction to get your approval, but once he has your commitment and he is ready to commit too. It is a done deal and the goal is achieved, therefore, you have to understand the change in his mindset.

He will move to his next goal, maybe to better himself to get an increase in salary for the benefit of you both. Saving to buy you the house you want and start diverting his focus, inevitability, giving you less and less romantic attention.

Do not misjudge this and see him as being on the other side of the fence, therefore, leaving you behind. You are a team and a unit, most of all, working together on the same side.

He needs you now, to be his pillar and to understand where he comes from. Talk about it and ask how you can help to make it easier on him to achieve that new goal for you both. Support him and be right there where he needs you.

  The Secret Language of Relationships. Four cornerstones of a relationship.

The CORNERSTONES to a healthy, committed, loving, long-lasting, intimate relationship are RESPECT, APPRECIATION, TRUST and  HONESTY to each other. ADORATION and DESIRE are the other two pillars supporting the intimacy behind closed doors, making it perfect.

Guidance with Granny The Secret Language of Relationships


● Women: love means Commitment and Romance. She wants to feel SECURE, LOVED, HAPPY and SPECIAL in a monogamist relationship. A woman wants OBSESSION, DEVOTION and INTIMACY.

  ● Men: love means FUN TIME, SEX and EXCITEMENT with the woman of his choice. He wants to feel SAFE, HAPPY, FREE and SECURE around you. A man wants RESPECT, APPRECIATION and ADMIRATION.


● One last piece of advice, NEVER TRY TO CHANGE A MAN!

Don’t even try my dear, because, you are wasting valuable time.                        

He will never change, and besides that, no one has the right to manipulate another person.   

If his behaviour is not what you want it to be, never try to conform him to make it work, because, it is never going to happen.

It is a clear sign you are not meant to be together. The relationship will NEVER be a happy one.            

 Accept it, end the relationship without feeling guilty or pity, especially not for yourself. Above all, you are doing both of you a favour.

Move on and search till you find the one who has all you want, he is out there, you just have to find him. Do not sit back and wait for him to come.

Make a list of all the characteristics important to you, what behaviour is important to you in a man and who you want him to be. 

What will your Lover, Best Friend and Hero BE like and not LOOK like? Go out and search for him. 

Try to meet as many men as possible, watch, listen and observe.

Hands of many friends one on top of the other declaring good close friendship

Never go by what a man says, it is what he does that is important. Do his words match his acts? 

Be elusive and do not become too serious too soon. Make an informed decision that will last for the rest of your life. Do it with an open mind but not open legs, my love. 

Guidance with Granny The Secret Language of Relationships

It is important to know the secret language of relationships. Have a successful long-lasting relationship, more so, pay attention to it with new skills learned. 

Everybody loves differently, some flourishes on spoken words other loves to touch hug and kiss, gifts does it for some and to do favours is another way to show your loved one your love. 

It is good to pay attention, even more, it will help you to realize and know the secret language of a happy partnership. You might have to find a way to change a few habits but it is worth it, my dear.

 Your loving Gran


Granny Stella